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A Newbies First Story Using Nuke Doc's
PHP-NukeJG writes "Here are the problems, and the SUBJECT says it. As to 90 plus % of the features in phpNuke, and phpBB we have zilch, zots, or Keiner!

Knowing programmers, with rare exceptions, most hate to comment code (forget the old days when every byte counted to squeeze into memory limitations) or write documentation. Most of them think, that since they have steel-trap minds, are fluent in 15 languages, that YOU should able to understand "what they meant!"

Well, while this old bear could take you back to the first scribbling of philosophy and psychology, the rest of my mind is struggling along with the rest of this world.

I can build you a computer from the MUM board up, and match the hardware, but I do not program, nor do I work well without…INTRUCTIONS…IN DETAIL…IN DEPTH, AND LOGICAL, especially when it's NEW!

Let me take the manual Add Story first, which is not like Submit news for the user. The Add stories are for the admin! Oh the…XML auto-feed (I've not a clue)

A. Required Tools: A degree in HTML (or book) or card pop-up, a degree in PHP or phpMyAdmin installed on server. (More on this later)
B. Leech FTP or Ws FTP Pro; Dreamweaver MX, or Web Wizard 2000; Photo Shop 6.0. A steal trap mind, and one major load of patience. All hacked of course! Well Leech was free!

1. Click on Add Story in Admin section, and scroll down.
2. First block is TITLE (add in "My bald Mum")
3. Next block is TOPIC (pull down menu as 'Select Topic')
4. Click on pull down block 'down arrow'
5. You have Zilch, Zots just a window with 'Select Topic'
Conclusion: We didn't make it past two blocks, and we already have a problem. NO
TOPIC!!!!!!
7. Scroll back up and click on TOPIC!
8. First Block 'Topic Name' NO SPACES PLEASE!
9. Ok, let's add "Bald Mum's" (sure must be a few hidden under those hairdo's)
10 Second block "Topic Text" (The first block says, example: gamesand hobbies) (the second block says EXACTLY THE SAME THING! Thanks FB…that was informative!
11. Read more it also says, full topic text...Whoa that was close, almost had to think.
12 Lets put in "If you have a Bald Mum Story, then this is the place to put it." (WRONG: Only 40 characters, and NO SPACES)
13 Lets try "StoriesofBaldMums" (Gee I wonder how that will PRINT OUT, well we will just have to go on here, and spend a couple more hours to find out eh!!)
14.Last block 'Topic Images' (Your ONLY choice phpnuke.gif.... Hummmm that's going to look stupid. Yep...sure will! Gee, I wonder where that phpnuke.gif is located?

Now you're desperate, you need a different GIF. You hit the forums, you get told; “DO A SEARCH” by some soul with a bad attitude, because all you want is to find out where that image is so you can change it or add another one.

And you shouldn't have been that stupid to ask to begin with, don't you READ!!!

Ok, back and do a search……since your reply comment was right in line with his bad attitude.

OK we go to search! We are logical...(Spockitized) so we enter "Topic Images" We look at all the pull downs; All Topics, Articles. All Authors, All….then below that we have; Search on, Stories, Comments, Sections, Users.

Ah......lets try ALL OF THEM! Opps...that got us 'no matches' Ok, lets hit the pull-downs. Help Requests, NukeCops and we will leave in All Authors, and we’ll search back 3 months since we are NEWBIES!!

Our results: Zilch, Zots...'NO MATCHES' Ok dummy, now what? Well, lets try Nuke Cops; Nuke Cops; All Authors; 3 months.

Ah ha!! We’ll put in IMAGES by itself! WOW!!! Success…we have 615 Matches Ok fool, make a pot of coffee, grab your smokes…it’s going to be a LONG NIGHT!!!

Final result: 'NO MATCHES' And you still have that idiot bomb sitting there!

Well gang, all we wanted to so was write a great story about our Bald Mum, who had a great sense of humor about it. We wanted to share it on our nifty new phpNuke site, and make it look great. We now are sh*t on the Forums and can't get a reply to anything.

So we go back to our story bent out of shape, and do the best we can, so we can see what the end results will be, and THEN we'll delete it, as it was a Test Story. Want to bet?

We finish, struggling along, and post it up, then much to our final absolute, frustrated amazement, we find we CAN'T DELETE IT!!

In this process you discover you didn't use HTML, (na, no one mentioned that!) and it's like reading a page without paragraphs, spaces between words, or more like Chinese script. You now need to use phpMyAdmin, get to your Data Base, and delete the crap you put in there. Oh...you don't know how????

Well back to the Forums, and be told you don't belong on the Web, because you can't read instructions…YOU DON’T HAVE; and simple questions, get slammed, or told…you should KNOW all this stuff, with a next to it.

Well your trying to learn, but you have NO TOOLS to work with except trial and error, and at that same rate, it took thousands of years before man figured out how to make his own fire…without waiting for a lighting storm to set a tree on fire. Then after weeks, and months of frustration, you find a soul that helps, and you end up here! Now, just maybe that Bald Mum story……?

Ok, now get FTP up, get on the files, find the images folder, click on it, go down the list and click on topics folder and you will find phpnuke.gif. If you have some cute clip art in .gif format (preferable) then send them up to that folder, and when you chose Topics in Admin, you will have a choice of images. My, that tidbit of information, only took you 18 hours and three days on the forum. You’re improving!

We aren't done yet; we need to get rid of that Bald Mum story, so. ...Load up that phpMyAdmin that took you 3 forums to find, and a week to get installed, and you should have something like below in your browser address line. http://www.mywebsite.com/phpMyAdmin/index.php

Now if you managed that ok, we have your database files sitting in the window to the left. Scroll down to nuke_stories and click on it once or twice (depending if your setup as a web page or not) Now click in that little white box, then look up top and click on browse. Presto, you see My Bald Mum, and you can Edit it or Delete it.

Now go back and write a great story that you had in mind, that is... if you can remember it after all the fun, fun, fun you had, thanks to incompetents!

If you found the story a bit sad, or humorous, wait till I write, “Installation of phpNuke, using that idiot ‘readme.txt’ file.”

By the way, it’s a known, that ALL programmers, will end up in purgatory, having to write instructions and comment code to get out! "
Posted on Sunday, August 24 @ 21:19:40 CEST by Zhen-Xjell
 
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Re: A Newbies First Story Using Nuke Doc's (Score: 1)
by dnuke on Monday, August 25 @ 10:50:33 CEST
(User Info | Send a Message) http://castlerain.com
Well, it's sad to hear that this person had such a rough time. However, with anything in life, there is a learning curve. You want to buy a car, it's a good idea to learn how to drive it. You want to have a computer, it's a good idea to learn how to use it (keeps it out of the shop this way). If you want a website that used HTML, PHP and MySQL, it would be a good idea to get a general understanding of it first. I didn't know anything about PHP when I started to use PHP-Nuke. I spent time learning it (couple of weeks or so), then I launched my first Nuke site. Fell in love with it and still going. Now I provide help to others within my knowledge range.

As for forums, yes, it can be quite irritating answering the same questions over and over. Thus it's appreciated if the person uses the search in different ways first before asking. And yes, sometimes, you may not find your answer. At least let us know you've given it an honest try first though. However, if you get someone who is just outright arrogant, it's a pity. No one posting on forums should be this way. Unfortunately, it happens.

Documented code. Programmers are under a lot of pressure for the release. They want to make others happy by getting the code out. This means cutting a corner or two to please the masses. Where the minority gets ignored and no commented code. Sacrifice one for the needs of the many....



Re: A Newbies First Story Using Nuke Doc's (Score: 1)
by GeoffM on Monday, August 25 @ 12:02:21 CEST
(User Info | Send a Message)
<b>Right on the Money!</b><br><P>
I put my forst PHP-Nuke site up around version 5, I've put up 4 more since then, I've tryed POST-Nuke, Proxima, and a couple of others, I've started over , wiped, cursed, abandon, lived with, and generally beamed (when things work correctly).<BR>
Having a Windows Systems/Hardware/HTML (1.0,2.0) background is no garuantee that your site will be flawess in it's function. the Author is 100% correct in his assesment. Documantation, Centralize Resources, and common language help is far and few (Today is 5X better then a year ago). this is prehaps the only disadvantage to open source. (Well, you can't expect everything in life to be 100%)



Re: A Newbies First Story Using Nuke Doc's (Score: 1)
by chris on Monday, August 25 @ 17:23:52 CEST
(User Info | Send a Message) http://www.karakas-online.de
Hello Nukers, the  PHP-Nuke HOWTO [www.karakas-online.de]  is now available as a  PHP-Nuke Module [www.karakas-online.de]  which will integrate nicely with your PHP-Nuke system, giving your visitors and users all the documentation they need, without having to leave your PHP-Nuke environment.  All you need is download the PHP-Nuke HOWTO Module [www.karakas-online.de], extract it in the modules folder and activate it from the administration panel. Having said that, let me add some remarks JG: Yes, the documentation is dated. I'm working on it. If you have some piece of docs that would fit in, send it in. I'm gathering material. No, it's not always the programmers' fault. I have called a lot of times for contributions to documentation. Other people have done it too, see all those projects like "let's do a module online", "let's expand the Nuke book online" etc. Splatt.it has put the HOWTO in a commentable form, similar to the one in the online PHP manual at php.net. I have set up a forum on my homepage with the primary aim of gathering documentation. What was the outcome till now? The online projects never went off, user's comments have still to show up in splatt.it and on my forum I have gathered quite a few threads that need only be cut and pasted in the HOWTO (which I plan to do, of course). But why this? Because people come to you only if you can solve them a problem. They don't come to put a brick on the building you are up to. So people come to my forum, I solve their problem, and through this process I get an insight of what they need, how we solved it and what could be put in the docs. Then I sit down and write it, take notes or whatever. To put it in one sentence: yes, the programmers did not sent a documentation, but the users don't volunteer to write something either. They either have to be enticed by a "return on investment" (you solve their problem, they give you access to what bothers them, so you get stuff to document), or... ...well, or they have to "get volunteered". :)


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